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Getting Help with Your New Year’s Resolutions

Well, here we are, a couple of weeks into the new year… How are those resolutions coming along?!?
 
According to StatisticBrain.com, 58% of Americans usually or sometimes make New Year’s resolutions. However, less than 10% ever feel they successfully achieve them.
 
The University of Scranton Journal of Clinical Psychology concurs that over 90 percent of the people who make New Year’s resolutions fail to keep them.
 
So, if you’ve already fallen off the horse, you’re far from alone…
 
It isn’t easy to stick to resolutions, especially if you set unrealistic goals or fail to put in place a plan for achieving the goals you’ve set.
 
This doesn’t mean that you can’t do it, just that you may want to take a long hard look at:


  1. What it is you’re aiming to achieve?
  2. What steps will you need to take to succeed?
  3. What kind of help is available to help you reach your goals?
 
You’re not alone when it comes to feeling defeated over failed New Year’s resolutions. But with help and plan, you can still achieve the resolutions you’ve set for yourself!
 
Why Is It So Difficult to Keep New Year’s Resolutions?
 
The simple fact that most people don’t realize is that the nature of the New Year’s resolution itself is often what dooms it for failure.
 
A resolution is simply a decision to do something or not to do something. But deciding to do something doesn’t magically make it happen. It’s just the first step.
 
Unfortunately, simply making a resolution doesn’t imply any planning or effort is involved once it’s been made. This is the reason so many people make New Year’s resolutions to quit smoking or lose weight only to find themselves chain smoking or eating an entire chocolate cake a few weeks later!
 
A goal, in contrast, is the endpoint towards which effort is directed. In other words, when you set a goal, you start with your desired result in mind and consciously acknowledge that a lot of effort will need to be expended in order to achieve it.
 
Setting a goal is about creating change. And, as we all know, creating change requires work.
 
Of course, while this is the main reason many New Years’ resolutions are doomed to failure, it’s not the only one. For example:


  1. Making resolutions for the wrong reasons – Setting a New Year’s resolution because others are doing so, or because you feel it’s expected of you, is more than likely to result in failure because you’re not truly motivated to create the change.
 
    2. Creating unrealistic resolutions – Henry Ford famously said, “Whether you believe you can             or believe you can’t, you’re right.”  The key is that you have to believe your goal is attainable in           order for you to reach it. If you don’t believe it’s possible, guess what? For you, it’s not. 

    3. Setting nonspecific resolutions – Being as specific as possible when creating your                         resolutions will not only make sure you and others know exactly what it is you’re trying to                     achieve and why, it will help you track your success and measure your progress along the way…

    4. Setting resolutions that are difficult to measure – Achieving goals involves sustained effort            over time. Accordingly, you need some method of measuring your progress toward the                        attainment of your goal. Having a measurable goal is what helps you to make sure you stay on            track.  

​While the concept of setting resolutions instead of goals may be problematic, once you’re aware of why and the common mistakes people make when setting New Year’s resolutions, you have a much better chance of being among the 10% who actually follow through and achieve their resolutions!
 
Further Improving Your Chances of Success
 
There are a number of ways you can increase the likelihood of achieving your New Year’s resolutions:


  • Think long and hard about why you’re making the resolution.
  • Create a pan for achieving your resolution.
  • Create specific milestones on your path to success, as well as a timeframe for achieving them.
  • Focus on the benefits, the results, of what you’re trying to achieve.
  • Discuss your resolutions and your plan for achieving them with others – even better, write your plans down for all to see!
  • Determine how you will reward yourself for each achievement on your path to success!
 
If you’re really serious about creating transformative change, then, in addition to the steps listed above, you may well want to consider seeking the help of a professional counselor or therapist.
 
Professional counseling and psychotherapy can help you uncover and overcome any unconscious obstacles that are holding you back from achieving the success you desire, whether these are due to behavior patterns that are obstructing your progress or unhelpful beliefs you picked up as a child.
 
Additionally, counseling and psychotherapy can help you learn some of the self-assessment skills necessary to make sure your resolutions are in alignment with your core values, as well as serve as a positive, motivational tool to keep you on track with your plan.
 
If you’re serious about creating transformation in your life, seek out professional assistance. There’s nothing wrong with asking for help… we all need it. And a licensed counselor or therapist’s job is to help you create the change you seek so you can move forward in the new year with confidence and optimism.
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